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[Music] it's been almost seven years since I began releasing personal development content videos this whole actualized org business and in those seven years I was on this journey to discover for myself how reality works what personal development is what are the best ways to do it what are the most effective teachings what does it all mean what does all boil down to because when I began this journey even of course much earlier than seven years ago seven years ago I was just started to teach you guys but before that when I was just trying to figure out life for myself the big question was like what are the principles that I need to learn to get the kind of life that I want and it seemed like there were so many different directions that we could go in like we could pursue money we could pursue inner self-esteem work we could pursue shadow work or we could do therapy or we could do NLP or we can do psychedelics or we can do meditation or we could do yoga or we could like there's so many things to do so how do you make sense of all of that and so just recently in the last couple of weeks I really have found for myself what it all boils down to what the highest teaching is this is the highest teaching in the whole universe I've boiled it down to one single phrase it's so simple it's shockingly simple and it unifies everything so what is this highest teaching it's self - love self love but this is no ordinary self love as you think of it I'm gonna have to explain what this really means because when you compress all of human development and not just human development but all development of all conscious beings in the entire universe when you compress that entire that entire mission so to speak into a two-word phrase self love of course a lot is lost a lot of the detail is lost it's necessarily very high level and very abstract and you don't know what to do with it so I need to explain to you what to do with it how to decipher it we got to break this down that's what we'll be doing in this episode but self-love I'm talking about capital uppercase s self and capital uppercase L love so capital self capital L love got it so if all of actualize that our teachings could be distilled to one teaching this would be it if you understood this one teaching properly you would be able to derive all the other teachings and understand how they fit in and what function they have or you would understand that some of them are extraneous and useless of course over the last seven years I've gone through a whole inner journey of understanding reality and every week basically for the last seven years my understanding of reality has been growing and changing and radically transforming which is why sometimes people accuse me of oleo why do you contradict yourself so much well the reason is is because I'm constantly growing so I'm not afraid to admit making mistakes and saying things that are wrong and changing my mind later because I would rather be right in the end rather than insist that I was right from the beginning you see so if you go back seven years and watch my early stuff it's gonna feel very different it's gonna sound very different and certain things that I say are no longer applicable from the stand point that I'm at now but also what I understand is that I can only have gotten to where I am now I can only have reached this sort of pinnacle of understanding how it all boils down to self-love by having gone through that process and making all of those mistakes and you will - and every living conscious being will of course they won't all make the same mistakes I've made we all make our own individual mistakes some of us make a lot more than another okay and some of us are much more stubborn about cling to our mistakes rather than admitting we were wrong so of course but you're gonna have to go through this process this is not something you can just avoid and even though I'm gonna tell you the ultimate answer self-love you can't just take that and now go run with it and live your whole life with it not really because what your life is is the actualization and the realization of what self-love means and why it's important and why it all boils down to this and not something else and this is rather shocking because you know if I traveled back in time and told my old seven-year-old self I mean seven years ago not seven years old just seven years ago if I told myself that I would be teaching self-love and that's all that this will boil down to my old self would have said no way this is some sort of hippie dippie airy-fairy new AG's nonsense it's not practical it's not realistic how is this really gonna address all the problems people have what have you been smoking I would have told myself that because I had to go through the process it's it's a huge process and you will too but also it's helpful for you to understand that this is how it is and I told you so so in 10 years and 20 years when you finally figure it all out if you get that far even you'll realize I told you so and this will be helpful because maybe it'll speed up your process so here's an interesting thought experiment for you imagine that mankind makes contact with a highly advanced highly intelligent alien species ask yourself what do you think this species would teach mankind let's say we had limited time limited bandwidth what would be the most important thing that they could teach us now many materialists and scientists like to go to some sort of gadgetry or technology or some sort of technical scientific knowledge like well they could teach us how to build a warp drive and travel faster than light that would be a game-changer or they would teach us what how to create super smart AI that we could use to improve our life or they would teach us how to cure cancer or something like this but that's not what they would teach us if they taught us that they would be a rather unintelligent alien species because all of that stuff it seems important if you're looking at reality from sort of materialistic paradigm and you're bought into this technological fantasy this tech utopia where we just have more technology that solves all our problems but what you don't realize that it doesn't solve anything because the underlying problem is a lack of self-love a lack of understanding of what self-love is so what I'm proposing is that if we ever make contact with such an intelligent species and I don't I don't claim that we will or we won't I'm agnostic about that I've never met any aliens myself yet but uh I mean it's reasonable that they're out there but if we meet them the funny thing is is that now I'm conscious enough to understand what they would teach us self-love because that's what we're lacking the most and because that is the ultimate lesson of the universe not just for humans right what I'm talking about here is much more profound than just simply some feel-good emotion for humans that's not what I'm talking about I'm talking about an existential force that drives all of evolution every species in the entire universe and other universes if they exist beyond our own multiverses whatever else and what I'm telling you is that you can become conscious of this for yourself you have to believe me this is something you will discover I'm just giving you a preview of what you will discover and anyways the more intelligent these aliens would be the more they would stress the importance of self-love now it seems kind of weird and in fact us humans you can you can almost imagine that imagine sort of a movie scenario this would actually be a really interesting kind of a movie scenario where humans make contact with aliens for a brief time and these aliens deliver this most important of messages but then the humans you know and the aliens say here's our most important advice for you the humans they receive this advice and then the scientists they look at it like what is this self-love now this can't this can't possibly be their advice what kind of advice is this this is this doesn't help us they're supposed to tell us about warp engines and things and then they throw it in the trash and they don't even communicate that message to the rest of society you see this is the problem when you run this through the materialist paradigm filters it takes already a fairly high degree of development and consciousness to be able to even appreciate such a teaching and not to dismiss it as some sort of fluff but of course interestingly you know this is not only a thought experiment there actually are people who claim to have made contact with entities and aliens through for example smoking and nvm t and if you read their trip reports and you talk to them about their life transforming experiences very consistently what they report is that these entities that they meet their greatest message is self-love is that just a fantasy is that just a hallucination well don't believe them don't believe me go check it out for yourself verify for yourself it's not hard to verify this stuff if you're really interested I mean after all when people make such extravagant claims don't just sit there on your ass and play the lazy skeptic where you're just skeptical about everything because it doesn't sound plausible to you go try it you see there's a big difference between making bold outrageous assertions about life and reality which are unverifiable and no method of verification is given versus other bold and outrageous claims which of course I make a lot of I make a lot of outrageous claims you know I tell you that you you're immortal but what I also tell you is I tell you that you can verify it for yourself and I give you the methods that you can use of course most of you guys don't use these methods because they're difficult to use you can't just go and do something for five minutes and then you're done although of course actually in this case with nn DMT you can literally you can go smoke it into five minutes you can find out whether this is real or not go find out if you if you dare or let's just keep talking more about self-love you know you don't have to do it if you don't want to anyways so the only way that an alien can be more intelligent than you is if it understands self-love deeper than you if you understand self-love deeper than an alien you're more intelligent than that alien you should be teaching it not it teaching you but see us humans worse or so poor at understanding and appreciating self-love and practicing self-love that if we ever did meet some some intelligent aliens if chances are very good that they would understand self-love much much much deeper than we do which is actually an interesting little practical rule of thumb that you can use for this your life how do you judge the quality of a teacher or a teaching you know there's a lot of different teachings and teachers out there who do you trust which books should you read and which ones should you believe and which ones aren't which ones are the good gurus and which ones are the bad gurus how do you know which ideologies are the good ones and which ones are the bad ones it's very easy to determine simply by the degree of self-love in that teaching rate the degree of self-love in this teaching on a scale of 0 to 10 so we can take fascism we can take old-school Soviet Communism we can take Nazism we can take white nationalism we can take capitalism we can take socialism we can take various kinds of ideologies various cults so we can see Christianity we can take Buddhism we can kind of put them arrange them all on a spectrum we can take science but science in their biology chemistry physics all that put it on a spectrum and give each one a rating and see how they all line up and what you're going to discover is the truest and highest ones have the most self-love and promote the most self-love and of course not necessarily in those words and I'll explain what self-love means here in a lot of detail in a minute I'm holding back a little bit to tease you so so yeah we can arrange it like that and then in this way you can you can find very quickly what the highest teachings are and but you don't need to be some sort of like scientist who rates these systems you know you don't need to be so scientific about your rating scale you can just feel it literally you can feel it in your body with your heart if you want you can just read a teach and read a book listen to a teacher and just ask yourself what's the degree of self-love of this teacher and teaching not just in words but also in speech in action in the way that they hold themselves the way they carry themselves in all aspects of their life in their relationships and their business and their money-making and in their sex life all that and you will get a really good sense of how pure this teacher is to a degree which to which self-love is lacking or any judgment or hatred is present in the teachings that betrays the corruption of the teacher or the teaching so you can look at something like Nazism you can read Hitler's biography and and his autobiography read through his teachings and listen to and then just ask yourself is this coming for a place of self-love how much so and of course you'll see that it isn't which is why it's a problematic ideology and if you go and you look at some waha beast a radical Islamic ideology you'll also see the same thing is it coming from a place of self love and you'll clearly see that it's not see now of course it's a little bit tricky because sometimes like for example with Christianity with Catholicism for example they like to preach about love and love is written in their Bible in certain parts at least certain parts not so much probably more than the New Testament they like to preach about you know Jesus love and O's and so forth so in this sense you might say oh well Christianity is the highest teaching well in a certain sense it is in that sense but there's still a problem because words are cheap it's really easy to talk a big game about self-love but then are you actually practicing it most Christians mouth Catholics even most priests and Cardinals are pretty poor in the implementation of the self love which is why there's corruption and problems in the Catholic Church that's the corruption and to the degree in which a religious teaching has any judgment or hatred within it whatsoever hatred of gays hatred of Jews hatred of Muslims hatred of Christians hatred of Buddhists hatred of of poor people hatred of rich people hatred of mm-hmm sick people judgment of criminals damning them to hell and so forth or even hatred of witches hatred of witchcraft and the occult fear of these things of course hatred and judgment go hand in hand with fear fear of any of these things if it's present in one of these spiritual teachings that's your clue that is a corrupted teaching maybe it was pure at some point maybe it was a pure teaching when it came out of Jesus's mouth 2,000 years ago but it ain't anymore it got corrupted and that's how you know it got corrupted really really handy rule of thumb so let's return to this question of self love I guess the question is how do you apply it because it's so abstract and so compact it's hard to apply because of this but believe it or not and here's my bold outrageous claim which you can try to test for yourself to see if it's true that all of mankind's problems ultimately stem back to a lack of self-love but what does this really mean how could this be the case it seems like it's so impractical to say this it sounds airy-fairy it sounds new agey it sounds like well leo but you know the people in the Congo starving children in the Congo you know they don't need self-love what they need is food what they need is vaccines what they need is a better economy they need practical things they need technology they need clean running water this is what they need not your [ __ ] self love they can't live off self love but see here now we're gonna try to define what self love is self love is a much more robust notion than you think remember capital s self and capital L love so we're talking about the ultimate self not yourself as a human identity I'm not saying that you need to love yourself as Leo or whatever you are as a man or as a woman or as black or as white I'm saying you got to love yourself as the self that you really are the awakened self which is the entire universe so if you do that then all the other problems will autocorrect themselves and I'll show you in a lot of practical detail in a minute how that works with specific examples right so I'm not just gonna be bullshitting you here but first a little bit more of the sort of the abstract theory so self love has two components self and love so the two most important aspects of understanding and implementing rather self love is to understand what self and love actually are you need to actually be conscious of what these things are to understand them and you can't from your current state of consciousness you can't do that from your current state of consciousness you can't do that through thinking you can't do it through reason and you can't do it through logic and you can't do it through science not the materialistic science that we all commonly know so the most important element for implementing an actual izing self-love is to have a proper definition of what self and love are and see that is the first step and already everyone almost everyone the plan has failed at step number one so they can't go any further and they can't implement it which is why it's so important to spend a lot of time talking about what is the true self and what is love of the capital l but of course talking about is not nearly going to be enough really what's required is a direct mystical experience of the true self and love with capital l you need these two distinct mystical experiences these are two facets of awakening I've talked about that in my episode about many fast the many facets of awakening these are just two there's more than two but these are the two you need these are the two crucial ones that you need of course you could have them simultaneously together as one glorious insight where they're fused into one because they are the same thing ultimately but also you can see them as two separate things you could glimpse one then the other and vice verse and then you can glue them together and and see how they interact and so forth see so look with what with with the stuff that I teach now it's it's so advanced that it it's just it won't it won't change your life unless you have these mystical experiences right so the reason I'm stressing this so much is because I know that many of you are watching and you're like you're trying to get it you're trying to figure it out but you're just you're spinning your wheels in the mud because you're lacking these mystical experiences and nothing can substitute for these mystical experiences you need a mystical experience of self and even mystical experience of love then come back and you will understand what I'm talking about and there will still be plenty more to talk about and plenty more for you to understand you're not gonna be done but you need at least a glimpse of that right to start to take these things I say seriously then they'll start to make sense for you and then the real work begins the real work then begins in embodying it and starting to apply it in your life so I wish there was some way that I could deliver these mystical insights to you through a video or through speech or through writing but it's just not possible all right so you're gonna have to go do that I've given you many techniques in the past for how to do it psychedelics yoga meditation contemplation there is breathing techniques pranayamas and shamanic breathing and so forth these might work some of these work better than others you'd have to experiment and find what works for you but now we're moving on because I can't deliver the mystical experience to you here right now so we're moving on with theory and actually now we're getting two examples here are some examples of how self love solves all problems let's take a look for example at insecurity now these problems I'm gonna be listing here these are some of the most common problems that people have in personal development ordinary I'm not talking about spiritual lofty stuff I'm not talking about enlightenment stuff now I'm just talking about ordinary life the kind of videos you want to see more of for me the very practical stuff like Leo how do I get over my physical appearance I don't like my physical appearance and I don't feel secure and confident in myself Leo how do I get over having a small dick because I don't feel secure and my dick isn't as big as I want it to be or Leo you know I have low self-esteem and because this I keep getting into bad relationships or Leo I'm not confident I'm shy how do i how do I become confident around people and stop being so shy how do I stop being so introverted and be more extroverted how do I get better at attracting women Leo how do I attract that husband that I want that nice you know high-quality stable man in my life who's not just gonna leave me for some bimbo how do i how do I find that guy Leo how do I manage my disagreements with people in my family we keep fighting with each other Leo what about my intimate relationship I keep getting into bad relationships and nothing keeps working and my partner doesn't listen to me and he's abusive to me and these sorts of problems right so what I'm saying is that these the solution to all of these is ultimately self-love so how does that work well it's a little bit more obvious with insecurity or low self-esteem for example literally low self-esteem is a lack of love of yourself that's literally what it is if you're worried about your physical appearance you think your nose is too big your teeth are too crooked or you don't like some freckle on your face or whatever it is some feature of your body most of us you know have something about our bodies that we wish was better and then we live with that for a whole life and we suffer through it every time we look in the mirror it's like oh man my nose my eyes my ears are too long or whatever it is for you hair isn't the way you want it to be luckily I don't have that problem so in this case how do you apply self-love well you see you're never gonna fix your low self-esteem externally you're never gonna fix your confidence problem or your physical appearance problem by changing your nose changing your ears changing your hair I mean you can try and people do do that but it doesn't ultimately work because even if you fix one thing there's still gonna be something else about you that you can't fix you can't fix everything even if you get a nose job there's gonna be something about you you can't change see and even if you do change it and even if it looks good now okay maybe you do a lot of cosmetic work on your face you spend thousands of dollars doing this stuff and then you're like well Leah look I improve myself and now I have high self-esteem because finally I look the way I should okay but what happens in 20 years when you lose your good looks due to just natural aging what happens if you get in a car accident and suffer some scar what if you get some disease that creates some you know disfigurement in your body or in your face what what then then you're you're shattered you see you're shattered you're gonna be lower than you were when you started because there are going to be situations in life where you can't change it some things you can change but a lot of things you can't change and up to this point in your life you've been playing the game of manipulating life to get the stuff that you want and then creating happiness that way but this is a fool's errand you can't always win with this strategy in fact you're guaranteed to lose right so if you really want to address the issue of low self-esteem are you tired of having low self-esteem are you tired of worrying about your physical appearance every time you look in the mirror are you tired of not being confident around people because you worry that you're too short or that you're too hairy or that whatever you're too bald and because of this you can't talk to that girl you want to talk to she she rejects you and this is how you feel and you don't feel good because when you go and you try on clothes at the at the department store you're putting on jeans but they look fat on you because you're worried about your weight and all this sort of stuff and it's just you're going through this and this is been happening to your whole life basically see then not only that but then you judge other people as well and then that creates suffering for you as well because it's not only that you think that other people judge you for being fat or being ugly you yourself judge other people for being fat and being ugly or whatever which of course these are two sides of the same coin if you didn't shut others you wouldn't judge yourself and if you'd enjoyed yourself you wouldn't judge others so here what's necessary to really address this issue at the root is to really accept yourself start to accept yourself and not just accept yourself but to realize the beauty of what you are this machine is biological machine matter of consciousness that you are that you can see in the mirror when you see your reflection this is an amazing creation it's an amazing thing but you overlook it because you're so busy with with these social games that you want to play see so here self-love is the answer but of course you're not just loving yourself as a human body that's of course a good starting place and you know you could actually literally practices you could stand in front of a mirror for five minutes every morning for the next month and just look at yourself in the mirror and just fall in love with yourself that's a good exercise practice that but beyond that to really fulfill the actualization of self-love here you're gonna have to fall in love not just with your physical body cuz that's a small part of yourself that's not the true self that's a part of the self but that's just a tiny piece of it the true self is the entire universe so literally when we're talking about self-love we're talking about falling in love with the entire universe as it is not as you fantasize it to be but as it is that of course includes your body but that includes the body of your spouse the body of your girlfriend or your boyfriend and not just their body but their personality how they are and not just that but country's political parties love that too because these countries and political parties are also part of the cell they're part of the universe just replace the word self with the word universe he's it a part of the universe while everything is by definition then that is you that is the true self so love that and what does it mean to love that it means to look at it and to appreciate its beauty to accept it not only to accept it but to embrace it and to recognize and to become conscious of how amazing it is how magical it is that this thing exists and that this thing is you really what you're doing as you're practicing self-love it's sort of like we're taking the same situation that's happening in the mirror every morning you know when you look at yourself um you know maybe sometimes you look in the mirror and you say oh I look I look good today I look handsome I look attractive I look sexy whatever and all my ass looks good my muscles look good my my face you know my my beard looks good today I've done my hair it looks nice today you know that and then for a brief moment you like yourself maybe you even love yourself for a brief moment well what I'm saying is that that we're kind of get that little sliver of love that you normally feel once a month or whatever in your life for a brief you know second or for a minute we're taking that or like for example when when someone pays you a compliment maybe some attractive person finds you attractive and they say oh I like your purse I like your shoes I like your you know well you know people give give you couple it and then when you get that compliment you feel really good because you know you can love yourself because they gave a little love to you well that we're taking that dynamic of looking in the mirror at ourselves and we're expanding that to the entire universe you are the universe looking at itself everything is your own reflection people trees cars animals countries planets stars all of it is your own reflection this is your own body or mind that you are inside of the entire universe is part of your own mind and so really what self-love is is the practice of the appreciation of your infinite mind which is generating this amazing show this amazing dream that we're in that it's generating you're generating it you don't know how you're generating it but you are and the more conscious you become the more you realize how amazing it is that all of this is generated by you and is you see that then puts into proper perspective and context your physical body because so long as you're preoccupied and only look at your physical body as yourself there can't be a deep love there because you're judging your body as to what it can do for you like well can my body perform sex can my body attract the right man can my body land me a marriage can my body perform the kind of work it needs to do or whatever this is all within the realm of survival and this is not true love this is all conditional love what we're looking for here is unconditional love love for a thing simply for its existence not dependent on what it can do for you so you can love a person because they do stuff for you that you like or that makes you feel good or that helps your survival for example many of you express your love to me but you're not doing it because you actually unconditionally love me you're doing it because I'm very useful for you in your journey to unravel the perplexity of life the videos are useful in that case you love me and then if I shoot a video that's not useful and then you hate me or if I shoot a video that offends you then you hate me you see this so your love for me has nothing really to do with true love your love is not about me it's about you to truly love me would be to love me just for my being for my existence now just expand that to the entire universe and recognize that what you're really doing is you're not loving me you're not letting some man or some woman or some some amazing politician or whatever or some rock star what you're loving is your own self disowned parts of yourself right so as your sense of self expands and your sense of love expands they start to fill up and take notice of the entire universe until literally you become infinite and your identity becomes one with the whole universe and your love becomes unlimited and totally unconditional and at that moment is when you reach your deepest awakening and at that moment is when you feel most complete when you feel happiest not just happy but ecstasy bliss orgasmic levels of joy if you were able to love that deeply but of course most of us are not and really now when I'm talking about this I'm talking about mystical States right this is not ordinary ordinary emotions we're beyond ordinary emotions here we're talking about mystical States it's not about feeling good in your body that's not our goal it's not our goal to always be feeling good about our own body or about the world our goal is to be so conscious that we appreciate our consciousness creates the appreciation of all of these different elements of life and reality you see it's loving reality simply for the sake of reality not because of what it can do for us and not because there's any reason to and not because we want to feel good it's not even that we're just literally becoming conscious of how amazing something is so what I'm saying is that if you became so conscious that you were conscious deeply conscious right in this moment of what existence is of what your body is of what I am of what the universe is if you really became fully conscious of that you would feel deep deep deep love existential love but right now you're not conscious of that but of course you've had these moments everyone has had these moments where you're looking at a beautiful sunset or you're looking up at the stars and you get the sense of profundity you're looking at a giant mountain and you're looking at its size and you're so sworps you right you're looking at this epic mountain and just it's amazing and you're like wow that's what I'm talking about in that moment what's happening that your consciousness is registering something about the scope of what existence is that normally you don't register because you're just preoccupied with mundane [ __ ] petty squabbles and meeting your basic needs and so that that feeling is lost but it's not just a feeling that feeling is a byproduct of your consciousness see like have you ever looked at an animal or the living creature and just looked at it so so long and so deep that you just you marvel at this is an amazing creature it's not you're not looking at it like you would look at a dog or a cat normally or just like oh it's a little pet that I can pet it's like no you're looking at this this is an an incredible bio-organic machine which has taken billions of years to evolve and here it is and look at how amazing all of its hair is its whiskers and its ears and the way it moves and you're just look at that it's like it's incredible what this thing is it's not just a kitten it's like it's incredible what it is it's not just cute it could be an ugly you know quote-unquote ugly creature it doesn't have to be some cute kitten you can look at and just appreciate it for what it is like you can look for example at the eye in fact maybe try this with your own iris go look in the mirror at how your own iris works and just how amazing it is in a structure how beautiful it is and and even not just how it looks witches can be amazing especially if you have some nice nicely colored eyes you can see that in your own eyes but also look at how the pupil dilates like it's amazing we just sit there in the mirror just look at it for a few minutes and you'll notice that it gets contracted and it expands it's doing this you could even you know fade the lights in and out you'll see the pupil changes and it's doing all this automatically like it's incredible that this is happening and you have no conscious control over this you don't know how you're doing it even though you believe it's you you believe your eyes are part of you and you still have no idea how they actually work what's controlling that dilation of the pupil is all happening on autopilot it's so amazing see and then when you realize that it's like oh wow I really appreciate that that's thing that I didn't appreciate I was taking it for granted well this now applies to everything you see and what needs to happen there is a consciousness so back some more practical examples so you see we're going from the practical to the sort of existential and then back again because that is our work is to bring the practical into the existential and vice versa and to merge the two together so that all the mundane stuff like cats and dogs and forks and knives and toilet paper so that all of this gets recontextualized as the miracle of consciousness of spirit which you've been taking for granted your whole life so let's talk about how to apply self-love when it comes to dating and attraction many of you guys who watch me are struggling to attract females understandable something that I've faced myself I think most guys face this problem in their life so a very common problem of course you ladies also struggle to attract the right kind of man and spouse into your life so so the problem with trying to attract women specifically is that you're doing it from a place that lacks self-love you're trying to get from the woman something as a big guy you're trying to impress her you're trying to extract sex from her you're trying to manipulate her to like you to go on a date with you to sleep with you to be with you it and all this and this becomes a very frustrating game you start to it you know go out there start hitting on girls and and and so forth and you keep failing you don't know why do I keep failing why don't they like me well a big component of is that you don't like yourself how can they like you when you don't like yourself see women are really good at reading off of you as the guy whatever you're feeling subconsciously so when you lack self love the woman smells that off you because your tone of voice is weak it's not confident she reads that off you within seconds your eyes are shifty they're not steady and focused you're smiled you don't have a smile because you're afraid when you're talking to her and you're anxious and you're nervous and all this sub communicates to the woman that you're a weak guy and the reason you're a weak guy is because you lack self-love but it goes even deeper than that you might say Oh Leo what I did a bunch of pickup and I slept with a hundred girls and now I love myself and I think I'm the I'm the boss you know I got the big dick and I walk into the club and I I hit on all the girls and I pull home a girl at night and at the end of the night and then I'm it's amazing and I'm so good and Leo I fulfilled yourself love imperative no you haven't you're just being a narcissistic dick see that's not true self-love because what you're still lacking is again your sense of self is still this limited pickup identity that you've created as a man that's not the true self true self-love here would be to be so loving that you love all women as a whole you love every woman that you're with you don't try to manipulate her because if you truly were practicing self-love you couldn't practice manipulation you see you actually care not about her as a sex object to satisfy your needs but you actually care about her needs you care about her agenda you care about her feelings what she's thinking what she wants what kind of life she wants to create with you what kind of relationship you guys are in see that's a very different dynamic than what most pickup people are doing you can be great at attracting women but you're still you're gonna be failing over and over again you're not gonna be satisfied I've known guys who are so good at pickup that they slept with 200-300 women they could go on any busy night on a weekend they can go to a club and they can that their chances of pulling a girl are really high shockingly high disturbingly high but I don't I don't envy these people because they're not satisfied they're not satisfied and they don't know what to do about it they think that they already have self love no you don't have self-love your self-love is so limited because your sense of self is so limited and your sense of love is so limited and the reason that is is because you haven't had these mystical experiences that need to be had in order to understand what self and love really are now for you ladies who struggled to attract a high quality man who's gonna stick around and be stable and want to commit to you right that's what you want most you so how do you do that well a lot of you can't do that because you have very low self-esteem you don't love yourself enough and then of course the man reads that off of you it's very easy for a man to to tell what a woman what a woman isn't confident about herself her appearance or other aspects of her life and then many men will not hesitate to manipulate and to take advantage of that so in both these instances the males and the females both of us need to learn self-love and then your relationships will go a lot better in fact you might even you might even reach such a high level of self-love that you won't even need sex or relationships anymore because those will actually limit your ability to just radiate self-love of course most people aren't there so there's nothing wrong with some sex or some relationships to hold you over until you get there how about disagreements with family and other people what's missing when these disagreements happen in fact in general when arguments of any kind happened what's really happening is a lack of self-love is being exhibited by usually both sides sometimes one side more than the other but in general both sides are guilty of it it's just a question of degree C you want to get along well with people without arguing without harsh disagreements practice more self-love again what this means is that you're not just loving yourself in the argument which everybody does that's what the ego does all the time you're loving the other party as well because you recognize that there's nothing special about you there's nothing special about your position in this argument your position is just as important as their position from the sort of that metaphysical perspective right when you're coming from a loving place many of these arguments and disagreements melt away a lot of families get destroyed by this maybe your own mother and father chances are quite good probably 50% chance that they got divorced why do they get divorced a lack of self-love ultimately see probably your father couldn't fully love himself and your mother and your mother probably couldn't fully love herself and your father now of course it doesn't mean that getting a divorce is wrong per se you could decide to get a divorce and that could also be an act of self-love so self love does not mean that you stay in an abusive relationship and that you love the abusive guy even though he's keeping keeps abusing you and ruining your life no see if you fully love yourself you would understand that to honor my my full self and to love to honor my capacity to love others and to love myself and to have respect for myself I need to set some boundaries and this person if he keeps crossing these boundaries then the most loving thing in the situation is not to keep being with him but to cut it off and move on with my life because otherwise I'm gonna be stuck in an abusive relationship and what kind of self love is that is that loving yourself to create justifications for staying in abusive relationship that's not self-love if you really love yourself you would want the best for yourself not in the short term but in the long term you'd want yourself to grow see you'd want your partner to grow how about the problem of dealing with death suffering illness injury wrongdoing injustice that's done to you how do you deal with these problems again these problems arise because of a lack of self-love if you get a serious illness what you need more than anything is self-love now of course you can take medication and chemotherapy and so forth and maybe that will help you maybe it won't it's a dicey game but regardless you're gonna heal much faster with self-love of course you can still take the medication and so forth but having self-love in that situation is critical for your battle with this cancer or whatever and even if you lose the battle I'm not saying that just by loving yourself you're gonna win the battle and now you're immune to cancer don't get me wrong but you need to be kind to yourself appreciate yourself be understanding of your situation like if you let's say break a leg you can react to it with anger and hatred and say oh god damn it how could I be so clumsy and so stupid I tripped over that banana peel and broke my leg oh my god this is terrible you can do that whole thing which then robs you of the resources you need to to be able to to deal with the situation and to recover better whereas if your understanding and you understand that well yeah of course yeah I slipped on that banana peel it's kind of silly but also you know yeah we all do silly things sometimes I can I can appreciate that I do silly things other people do silly things let me love the fact that I do silly things other people do silly things were all clumsy sometimes sure this was a stupid thing but but let me just let me love it let me let me learn from it what kind of lessons are there here see that's a much healthier attitude and that will lead you to a faster recovery and to better things and in fact that breaking of the leg even though it'll hurt and it'll be inconvenient for a while you might learn some profound spiritual lessons from that about suffering about pain about maybe empathizing with others now when you see somebody else with a cast now you empathize with them see it helps you to be more loving to suffer or when some injustice is done to you you can judge it and hate it and resist it and demonize it or you can embrace it with love you can realize that the the one who is doing injustice to you is none other than you from an existential perspective right the universe is doing this to itself so if someone broke into your car and saw some stuff this actually happened to me I'm I'm I'm bringing this up because it actually happened to me a couple of years ago I was driving with my ex girlfriend we were on a hiking trip we drove through Fresno yeah I think it was Fresno California mm-hmm and we just stopped there for the night and my car was packed to the roof and to all the seats and all the trunk everything was packed with gear cuz we were on like a hiking trip it was kind of late fall so it was cold so we had jackets and boots and all sorts of stuff and then yeah somebody broke into my car and stole everything and I remember I remember like it was painful for a few days after that event especially the day of the event like it was almost like someone like stabbed me in the heart by stealing all this stuff like they stole my GoPro camera they stole I had this I had some fishing gear with me I had this tackle box of fishing supplies that's like probably 20 years old I've had it since I was like a kid with my dad we'd go on fishing trips like this had a lot of sentimental value to me I had like old fishing lures and stuff like that in there and like this is irreplaceable stuff I had like a little notebook of every fish that I caught like recorded in there like like this is decades old and some some ass stole this stole this fishing box and all my stuff so yeah it was heartbreaking but then also what helped me is that at that moment you know I I was I was conscious enough I understood enough of these principles of spirituality and self-actualization so forth that I tried to actually empathize with the person so rather than hating him actually in that incident I discovered that Fresno Fresno California is apparently the meth capital of the world so there's a lot of meth addicts there it's it's a terrible situation they have a lot of these sort of carjackings and car break-ins because everyone there is like hooked on meth and opioids maybe as well and yeah it's just a terrible terrible situation and they don't know what to what to do to help these addicts so when I thought about that I actually thought about how oh okay so this must have been like a a method a desperate meth addict who broke into my car and you know yeah okay he stole some stuff he stole my jacket my favorite jacket and some of my clothes and my blankets but then I'm thinking like well but now he's probably sitting there in the cold in my jacket with my blanket at least he gets that out of it you know gets a little bit of relief of his suffering there and I can totally understand why he would do that cuz meth is a very addictive and so in this sense you know I was practicing self-love there by by empathizing with the situation and seeing it not just from my personal ego perspective but seeing it from a sort of a universal perspective so it's actually quite sad not for me personally that my stuff was stolen it's quite sad just as a condition of the social system in America that we have all these opioid addicts and drug addicts meth addicts on the streets living homeless they don't have care nobody the government's not helping them that neither political party really wants to help them with poverty and the way capitalism works in all this you know they're just living outdoors in the cold suffering dying overdosing catching HIV and so forth with these needles and whatever else like that whole situation is very sad love that that is you that is yourself that is the universe that's what it is love that that's self-love when you when you can connect with that if you can connect with that if you can have that level of detachment and perspective that level of consciousness and this takes consciousness then it's very hard for people to do you wrong this is the ultimate antidote here now granted is difficult to practice this how about the problem of killing yourself at work by overworking how many of you are workaholics I know your type so this is a very practical problem people ruin their health by working too much eating junk food at work chugging down cokes and diet cokes and snicker bars and all this nonsense Cheetos and Doritos and all this [ __ ] you're destroying your body see so you're not practicing self-love at work you think you love your work but really that's a very limited definition of love there if you were really practicing self-love in this situation you would love not just a little sliver of your work but you would love also and recognize the importance of the entire situation so it's not just that there's work that needs to be done and money that needs to be made it's like no there's work that needs to be done there's money needs to be made I'm also doing it because I'm passionate about it also my body needs to feel comfortable and good doing it I need to feel well rested so that I can be at my most creative I love being creative so if you truly loved yourself you would not want to put yourself in a situation where you are working 80-hour weeks doing grunt labor and just chugging stuff out and killing yourself in your body and your emotions in the process and maybe even your family and all this if you truly loved yourself you wouldn't put yourself in that situation and you could correct that you could find new ways of working or different types of jobs or get entirely different careers you see so this self love you might wonder well leo it's so impractical but it's not impractical when you have a very robust understanding of of this concept and how to apply it it's not impractical at all what I'm telling you is that any problem you have in your life look at that problem and then apply this robust notion of self-love expand your sense of self in that situation expand your sense of love and then ask yourself okay what should I do next practically what should I do about this see for example let's say you're working at a nine-to-five job that you hate Starbucks or subway or someplace and you're just you detest this job you got to get up every morning you're barely there you're not motivated you hate yourself you feel like you're trapped and you're in a corner and all this but you got to do it for the money right so in this situation now you're feeling bad you might even start to feel depressed you might even contemplate suicide if this goes long enough you know 10 20 years so what's the solution self love expand yourself love what does that practically mean well if you really love yourself would you keep working at that job if you really loved yourself could you muster up a vision a new vision of a new job a new career and you own a new way you could retrain yourself of course you could you see but you need that vision where does a vision come from from love you need to have a new love something you're passionate about you're not gonna get out of that miserable situation unless there's some extra passion that you have that can motivate you and push you through some difficult time to get over that hump so maybe you're gonna have to work two jobs now because you now you expand your self-love and you say okay I'm really passionate about making music that's what I really want to do but I don't know how to get there so Leo how is self-love gonna help me with that I'd need more money not more love but to get more money you need first more love and a deeper sense of self because right now your little how did you get in this shitty situation in the first place see by lack of self-love the reason you work in a subway or a Starbucks is because you didn't spend time earlier in your childhood in your youth really loving yourself in developing a sense of passion about life because if you did that I guarantee you you would never end up in a Starbucks or a subway see people who get there they get there by accident because they didn't plan anything didn't have any passions they'd really follow through on it see they didn't have a large enough sense of self a large enough sense of mission large enough sense of life purpose where does life purpose come from from self love you have to love yourself so much you have to love reality so much that you want to contribute to it in a meaningful way not by working at Subway and and so if you want to get out of that situation we're gonna have to do and like literally I I did this is I worked double I had my main job nine to five job and then on the weekends and at night I would come home and I would work double to start my own business but the reason I could do that is because I had a vision I had a passion I had a love for myself and I I knew my own potential and I knew that I wasn't living up to my potential and my potential I knew was so great that I knew that staying 95 job was was just unacceptable it was unacceptable I loved myself too much to accept that and then from there that led to a lot of good stuff a lot of very practical stuff money came from that I made hundreds of thousands of dollars that are sitting in my bank account from a higher sense of self love than most people which enabled me to have a deeper sense of life purpose than most people which enabled me to work harder than most people which enabled me to be more creative than most people which it enabled me to be more passionate in my work than most people which allowed me then to become financially independent that's how you do it expanding your sense of self love what about if you have fear of starting a business seems like a very practical situation it's likely oh I want to start a business but I'm afraid I don't know what if I'm gonna go broke and so forth what are you gonna need to overcome that more love you're not gonna overcome fear with fear fear is overcome with love you're gonna have to love your idea for your business so much you're gonna have to love your vision so much you're gonna have to have such a sense of purpose that this business is really gonna change the world in some meaningful way that you believe in and the only reason you can you can motivate yourself like that is because you have to really genuinely love the world love reality if you're not if you don't love reality if you don't love the world if you don't love life if you don't live human beings how can you create a business that helps them and if you don't create a business that helps them what are you know you're gonna create a business that hurt them well good luck creating a successful business that hurts people now of course that still doesn't stop a certain a big pharma companies and big oil companies they it is actually possible in a Wall Street and so forth it is possible to start a business that is successful and that hurts people but first of all it's not a sustainable business all those businesses will go out of business pretty soon within a matter of decades and also it's a terrible way to live life because even when you win you lose even if you get all that money you're still going to be miserable and depressed the only way to really win a business is to create a business that helps people that's your payoff for business the payoff for for a great business is not the money it's the smile you put on people's faces that's the payoff if you're doing it correctly and to to have that motivation you to really love yourself and really love other people and love reality see so actually the reason that many of these sleazy business people types these sort of Wall Street types or these sort of scammers that run Ponzi schemes and so the Bernie Madoff and so forth some of these sleazy CEOs and you know who take giant you know compensation packages and so forth these people they're not conscious people these are miserable people they might seem flashy and successful on the surface but deep down they're miserable they're empty they're hollow inside and the reason that is is because they don't really love mankind they don't love the world as much as I do for example so they are happy working in a job where they are just scamming others or exploiting others manipulating others whatever they're happy doing that where I was like I would never be able to sustain that because my love is too high see I love myself too much and I love the world too much to do that I don't want to start a business like that but many people they don't care so how do you get yourself out of this if you're one of those types who right now has a job where you're not really doing any good for a mankind in fact you're probably doing something bad like you're selling them sugary drinks working at Pepsi or something if you're some VP of Marketing at Pepsi for you to get to the next level in your human evolution and in your happiness and to be able to be a good father to your children and a good spouse to your wife and all this what neat what you need to have have happened is you need to raise your level of self-love expand your sense of self beyond your family beyond money beyond having a car in a house expanded to include mankind as well the environment animals all that expanders themself and expand your ability to love so you're not just stuck in your head calculating numbers figuring out how to squeeze and manipulate people and sell them more sugary drinks and ruin their health but you gotta love people so much that you become so conscious that you realize that why am i ruining the lives of millions of children selling the sugary drink when instead I could be putting my brain power and my creative vision into coming up with a new beverage that might be healthy a healthy alternative that would actually help all those kids and you know help millions of people to wean themselves off of soda which is causing obesity and cancer and God knows what else diabetes and so forth see but the only way you can make that evolutionary leap is by expanding your sense of self love so really if you're working at one of these for lack of a better word a devil jobs one of these devil jobs you're lacking self-love your self is too small and your love is too small and you're so preoccupied with business and with money and marketing and sales you're not leaving any room open to inquire into the metaphysics of reality into spirituality you're not leaving yourself time to meditate to contemplate to do psychedelics to go on a retreat in the rainforest because you're so busy selling your stupid [ __ ] soda so that you can make next quarters you know benchmark of profits and then you could get a little bit more of a compensation package some more stock options or whatever it is that you don't even need anymore because you've already got enough way more than you need to be fulfilled but you can't help yourself why because you're afraid and the solution to fear is self-love if you have money problems this is a self-love problem I know it sounds ridiculous it sounds new agey to say this because what could be more utilitarian than a money problem leo those poor kids in Africa they have a money problem they have an infrastructure problem they have a HIV problem they don't have a love problem but all those problems are love problems to have money you need to have a right economy to have a right economy you need to write society to have the right society you need to have no tribal warfare to have no tribal warfare people need to respect each other people need to be open minded people need to be able to listen to each other that requires self-love an expanded set of self and expanses of love many of the most impoverished parts of the world are parts which are crippled by corruption and by tribalism and by ideology these create a sort of an a trifecta that's really difficult to resolve and that creates a really bad econ economic situation with little Economic Opportunity and and then of course yeah of course in that situation yeah they need money but how are we gonna solve this are we gonna solve this money problem by just dropping buckets of cash from the skies it's not gonna work because even if you did that in these countries they are so corrupt so tribal and so ideological that even when the UN air drops in food supplies and aid and all this sort of stuff the local dictator or the clan leader in the region will just take all that food sub and he will sell it and just make a profit for himself it won't even go to the hungry kids so what's the problem there well part of the problem is that these clan leaders they're usually tyrannical they basically run a mafia and they're totally corrupt and they're authoritarian why is that because they're extremely selfish their sense of self is very limited and their sense of love is very limited see they're wrapped up in survival now of course I'm not blaming them for that that's just how it is and you need to love that as well but but the only way that situations gonna exchange is if that nation changes its culture changes this society so that there's an expanse of the self first what that's gonna entail is that the two or three or four factions that are engaging in this feudal clan warfare with each other they need to expand it to themself such that they recognize that wait a minute guys were a unified country we're not four different tribes were one country we're one people we have more in common than we have that differentiates us it's like the different factions of Muslims the Sunnis and the Shiites and so forth they realize that oh we're all actually Muslims let's get together and actually create a Muslim society that would be one step up then the next step up for them would be to realize like oh it's not that she's more Muslims and then they're they over there are Christians or they over there are atheists and infidels it's like no we're Muslims and they're Christians and and and they're atheists but that's all me that's all myself so myself expands to include all of that so now all of a sudden as a Muslim I don't have to fight with the Christians in the atheists I can realize that oh well people have different perspectives and ultimately in the end it all still all leads to self love see and then you could expand even further beyond that so that's how ultimen that's the root solution to many of those problems of course that's difficult to do I'm not saying it's easy it can't just be done on a purely individual level has to be on a collective level as well but that would be a way to go about it how about political problems problems with government problems in international relations well obviously these are self-love problems I hope you can see this almost all political problems are a debate between two sides these two sides hate each other misunderstand each other do not listen to each other are closed-minded to each other's perspectives and needs and different levels of development and so then of course there's there's combat and warfare and dirty politics and tricks and manipulation and selfishness and devilry and corruption and all this see how do you overcome that how do we as Americans for example in America overcome this polarized time that we're living in with Trump and the different factions of Democrats they're all fighting with each other and all this how do we resolve this by expanding our sense of self and loving the whole situation more loving the other side more as sappy as that sounds that is a problem is that there's not enough self-love going around in this time see and that's that's perhaps the the biggest tragedy of of Trump's influence on American politics and even global politics is that he infected it with his own lack of self love see pitting people against each other pitting factions against each other demonizing anybody who disagrees with him demonizing anyone who stands in his way of course Democrats are also guilty of that to some extent but Trump is the king of that how about if you're doing spirituality you're meditating a lot you're doing solo retreats you're doing psychedelics you're doing yoga but you're not getting the results you want it's taking longer than you thought you're having ego backlashes you're backsliding you're you're struggling to meditate you keep falling off track and what's the solution is it to hate yourself more no its self-love more self-love be more kind to yourself be more understanding be more loving of the entire spiritual process don't just be meditating just to meditate like a machine like a robot enjoy the meditation see why aren't you loving your meditation session the whole point of meditation is to get you into self-love but the way you're doing meditation is so mechanical and so regimented and so empty of love that of course how are you gonna get there a bad trip on a psychedelic what do you do do you go cry about it no more self-love now of course crying could be a part of self-love nothing wrong with crying but yeah the the only thing you need after a bad trip is more self-love and the only reason the bad trip happened in the first place is because of a lack of self-love because the trip was tried to expand your sense of self and expand your sense of love but your ego was so scared he was holding on it was resisting or maybe you overdosed or whatever because you were careless in which case it was too much right the self love became so great that actually turned it to hell because you weren't prepared for it you know so what's the solution to that more self-love after a bad trip the best thing you can do is wrap yourself in a warm blanket make yourself some hot cocoa sit by the fire or just go out look at the Stars maybe chat with some good friends have some laughs maybe watch a comedy whatever this sort of stuff but you're not gonna be able to do that if you're gonna be hating on yourself or worrying you see worrying hate fear these put you into very unrests from which you make stupid decisions and you don't do the obvious things little practical things that could soothe your situation and bring you out on top and then mistakes happen for example you have a bad trip and because you don't love yourself enough you're not able to soothe yourself and consult yourself properly after that you're not able to heal and get over it you know you you're left wounded and then you say notice I can I look forever and you miss out on this amazing entire domain that could have transformed your life you say no to it why because you didn't love yourself enough violence crime mass shootings terrorism racism abuse how do we deal with this sort of criminality by hating it by judging it of course not this look the worse your problem is the more self-love you need the problem is is that when your problems are really serious you're least likely to take self-love seriously you're more likely to say olio but you're just talking airy-fairy [ __ ] no I'm not it's just really hard to do and when things get really bad like you have terrorism or mass shootings and violence and racism and so forth yeah the reason that situation is so bad is because it lacks so much self-love and it needs a massive infusion of self love but of course the ego when it has little self-love it can't tolerate a lot of self-love infused into it it literally has a sort of a backlash bad trip reaction so if you really are serious as if we're serious as a society we want to stop all these mass shootings if we want to stop violence if we want to stop poverty and terrorism what do we do self love and all the ways that manifests if you really expand your sense of self to include the terrorists to include the mass shooter you would be able to empathize with their situation understand how they got to where they are see that doesn't mean we have to allow it to happen but you can understand more properly why it's happening why are people so upset with their lives that they're willing to go into a school and shoot up children that's not just some random thing you see that that something has to be seriously wrong in society such that we don't support all citizens properly such that some of them fall through the cracks so deeply that then they become suicidal this way and take others with them see so really if we cared about this we would create a sort of a safety net that would catch a mechanism that would catch those people that are falling through the cracks we would identify what the cracks are we would actually be curious enough because we would empathize with them rather than just saying that all they're just psychos or they're just scumbags if you treat them as psychos and scumbags you can't solve the problem you can't help them you're blaming them for the problem when really maybe the problem isn't them but it's their environment it's their conditioning it's what they've been taught it's how their mother or father abused them and the reason the mother father of use them is because they didn't get the proper parenting education or maybe because the mother was in such poverty she had to work three different jobs she didn't have time to spend with her child when he was young she couldn't afford daycare for him and so he grew up with the wrong kind of you know gangs and then whatever and then you know god it's drugs and got into other things and that led to to a bad situation that spiraled out of control see so all these things especially we're talking about these large social problems that keep recurring again and again and again like mass shootings and terrorism and racism these are systemic problems they happen because the way that our society is structured is creating as a function of its structure these side effects if you will so we need to look and change the structure but to be able to change the structure we have to be able to expand our sense of self and expand our sense of love how about the environmental problem that we have is our problem that we're pumping out too much co2 I mean it is from a sort of a technical scientific perspective with global warming but the deeper problem is the lack of self-love that's why we're pumping out the co2 even though most people know that pumping out this much co2 isn't good the giant oil companies have known about this since the 1970s they have their own internal reports where their own scientists knew that this would be a a future possibility a future problem to deal with but they did it anyways why is that because the people that run these companies don't actually love the environment they don't love animals they love money more and that's because their sense of self doesn't incorporate animals and environment instead they go hunt animals for trophies on safari that's how they show their quote/unquote love for animals but of course you wouldn't do that if you really loved animals if you really expand yourself to include them in the environment see most people take the environment for granted they don't they don't actually treat the environment as they treat their own body or you know some people treat their own body so bad that that's exactly how they treat the environment which shows you how deep the problem goes if if one third of Americans are obese which i think is roughly correct although don't quote me on that then and of course yeah is this a surprise that we treat our environment so bad when we can't even treat our own bodies well and it but is it the fault of the obese people no it's not their fault per se again it's it's all part of the system because of all the fast food the soda the drinks the marketing of food bad food that happens on TV all the time with no consequences see I would bet that 90% of the stuff that's marketed on TV and on YouTube could no longer be marketed if only the people that were marketing it expanded their sense of self love the only reason they can market it is because they don't love themselves and they don't know what the self really is what's the solution to depression suicide self-love what's the solution to addiction self-love what's the solution to various ideological disagreements self-love was a solution to parenting problems more self-love see you think that your child is unruly and causing problems and not getting good grades and hanging out with the wrong kids and that really likely oh no my child's problem is that he's he's hanging out with the wrong bad influences and they're gonna get him into drugs and other things that's the real problem not a self-love problem but the reason your child is so disconnected from you he's because you've been nagging him and criticizing him his whole life telling him how bad he is and what he's not supposed to do but then he's developed this rebellious streak he he doesn't even communicate with you anymore because you weren't able to see and love him for who he is and now this alienation has created you have to work extra hard to overcome that alienation how do you overcome that alienation through more self-love and the reason you judge your child and kritis appoint out all the wrong things that he's doing how foolish he is and how he's doing all the obviously dumb stuff the reason you're doing that is because you yourself are so self judgmental and you hate yourself so much and you don't accept all these aspects that are in your child that you've seen your child those are all the aspects that you've denied in yourself that's your shadow so you're projecting your shadow and your your you're projecting your shadow onto that child and what that child really wants is love but since you're not providing it his friends are providing it the drugs are providing it his you know toxic girlfriend is providing it his gang is providing it the tattoos he gets that's providing it because you couldn't provide it yeah that's tough it's tough it's real tough for a parent to admit that they don't actually like their child cuz it's like it's supposed to be automatic that all everybody loves their child and in a sort of says you love your child but now another sense yeah you love your child or at least you say you do but you don't you don't accept them unconditionally which is the number one mistake of parenting is not accepting your child unconditionally and that's because you don't know how to because you haven't accepted yourself unconditionally a lot of these problems would autocorrect if you expanded your sense of self love so I want you to notice that every time that you're not happy in whatever situation doesn't matter what context self-love is lacking in that situation what's the most important thing you can teach your children self-love what's the most important thing for a successful relationship self-love what's the most important thing for artists creative types and even business people successful business people what suppose more than self-love what's the most important thing for conscious politics as I've talked about in my four-part series for that to work self-love what's the most important thing for leading other people self love if you don't love yourself you can't lead others if you don't love yourself you can't be a great artist or be great at creativity and you can't be a great business person you might think that no olio that's not true there's a lot of people who make themselves but are good at business or very narcissistic and selfish but think of how much greater they could have been a business if they love themselves more being great at business is not measured by how much money you make being great at business as measured by the impact your business makes on the world so I don't care if some Wall Street type runs a hedge fund that earns a hundred million dollars a year that's not being great at business because that hedge fund is just leeching money without offering any serious value it's not creative work to be really accessible business as somebody who's contributing something new to the world and is passionate about the work that they do and isn't it just doing it mechanically for money or some external reward someone who is putting smiles on people's faces not at the expense of others but you know in a truly win-win sort of way in a constructive way not a destructive way because you know it's easy to put smiles on on on the faces of some some rich person by you know getting them a lot of return through your hedge fund but then that comes at the expense of all the other people you stepped on in order to take their money because that's the zero-sum game there what's the most important thing for healing and helping other people self love what's the most important thing for dealing with criminals and evil self love no amount of money success Fame a house sex a family or Beauty physical appearance I mean can compensate for a lack of self-love and people desperately try and try and try and to manipulate to get all those other things but fundamentally they're lacking self-love but they don't realize that because when you lack self-love you don't know that you lack of self-love and actually you're a denial about it you think that what you really lack is some external material so stands like money more a house so there cannot be happiness without self-love and that basically means the whole spiritual path boils down to learning self-love self-love is the ultimate strength in the ultimate power so this is how you judge the development level of a human being is how deeply is he or she able to self-love and it's really just as simple as that but why is this the case why is self-love so powerful because it's the ultimate truth it's not a feeling it's not an emotion it's an absolute it's what reality is is self-love consciousness the only substance that exists out of which every universe and multiverse is made out of which every physical objects make consciousness this conscious so she's right here right now constructing this very moment this consciousness is the same consciousness that's constructing all possible moments and this consciousness is in love with itself constructing this grand infinite dream that is the very essence of what consciousness is anything less than total self love is falsehood corruption and delusion separation and division and partiality and bias to reject any part of yourself or reality is ignorance foolishness fear and coming from limited consciousness so this infinite mind which is God which is this present moment at all possible moments that ever will or have occurred this is what it is it is pure consciousness and God is equivalent to self-love now you might wonder why why would reality love itself Leo couldn't reality just be a physical thing why do you have to bring love into it see this is this is your question from the materialist paradigm I get you I understand the hesitation and the concern and the doubt here's here's why what you understand is that reality has to be itself a thing can't be itself and at the same time not be itself it has to fully be itself so really to say that reality loves itself and that God is self-love all that is being said is basically that a equals a if we have a a has to be a a can't be be a can't be C a has to be a so if we have all of reality as a whole think of it as one particle if we compress the entire universe into a single particle and we look at it from afar which we can't do but if we could like this that little dot that contains every possible thing that exists that little dot is precisely what it is a equals a that dot is the dot and that is the love because this little dot is occurring within consciousness consciousness if it's fully conscious has to be conscious of the fact that it's conscious and what it is to be conscious and everything that is within the contents of its consciousness to be conscious is simply the unfolding of self love so an infinite consciousness which is what God refers to an infinite consciousness cannot hate itself judge itself reject itself or wish ill on itself or exclude itself because that would be insanity it would be like a denying that it's a so from God's point of view here's how God looks at it I am God I am exactly what I am I am a complete necessity a complete tautology I can't be anything other than what I am which is infinite consciousness as infinite consciousness I have to be exactly how I am which means that I have to accept myself exactly as I am dad is in other words the truth the truth accepts itself as the truth the truth can't deny itself what it is because the truth is just what is so what is has too is and now we're reaching rock bottom below which there's nothing you can't get any lower than isness so is this just is consciousness is what it is is not just the way you imagined is materialist you imagine well Lea we can can't we just have like some material universe out there somewhere outside of consciousness outside of God who cares about God and all this love none of this matters what if there's just like a material universe and it just exists well let's go with that let's imagine a scenario where there is no conscience whatsoever let's imagine a universe with no consciousness there's only what you would call matter dumb lifeless unconscious matter so what's going on here you might have planets and stars and so forth but no humans and no animals for simplicity sake so in this situation that you're imagining you just imagine it well that could just exist right it could just be like that with no conscience no love nothing is there it is no you're wrong because the only reason you can imagine that is because it's happening in your consciousness and for for that thing too is for that thing to be even if it's just a material object it's the truth of it is that it still is exactly what it is a equals a so if it is that thing that means that it has to accept itself relative to itself it has to accept itself so the material the material universe as you are calling it has to accept itself for what it is and that's consciousness I know it's probably not very convincing to doesn't sound logical at some level because it's you can't you can't put this into words I'm kind of I'm trying to hint at it maybe you can get it maybe not but yeah you just have to realize that for something to be it has to be the truth and that is what consciousness is stop thinking of consciousness as some biological phenomenon that is happening in the brain stop thinking of it as a as a byproduct of living creatures that's not what consciousness is consciousness is simply what is living creatures are not conscious you are not conscious rather that human body that you think is you is being imagined by universal consciousness which is not had by any entity or creature or being it is just is it's the truth it's the absolute truth and it has to accept itself see what I'm saying is that just for a physical object to exist like this finger for it to be here right now it has to accept that it's here it's a little weird to say it that way because usually we attribute acceptance to a book to a psychological function of a human but you have to you have to see acceptance as a sort of a metaphysical existential thing as a physical thing physics is acceptance like reality has to accept itself to allow itself to be itself I don't know how else to say it hopefully that cleared it up if you're confused I understand you need mystical experiences we can't go any deeper with words so it's not enough merely to accept yourself though you might think like well leo so what's the difference being self acceptance and love aren't they just the same thing so why don't we just say acceptance instead of love why do we have to bring love into it it sounds too girly and too emotional but it is love we're not merely talking about acceptance here you can't get more to see problem with talking about love is that it there's nothing there's nothing but love so you can't explain it anyway because anything you're using to explain it is itself it so you must enter into an ecstatic union with yourself when consciousness realizes what it is when consciousness becomes conscious of itself it enters into an ecstatic union with itself it recognizes its own existential Beauty you as consciousness recognize how amazing you are and you are amazing we are amazing we are consciousness we are the only thing that will ever exist could ever exist and we have existed for eternity we are it we are consciousness we are loved and the only problem is that some of us don't recognize it some of us recognize it more than others some of us recognize it then we forget and we recognize it again a year later than we forget then we recognize it a week later than we forget and then some of us aren't recognizing it all the time 24/7 those would be the Mystics in the Yogi's who've done a lot of work on themselves and are really awake do you realize how amazing this is right here how amazing you are how amazing everything is even all the stuff you hate how amazing it all is just the fact that it is and it's been forever and that this is a function of infinite consciousness this is so amazing there's it's so amazing there's nothing else to compare it with it's infinite amazement that's what we are we are infinite amazement and I'm suggesting that your job is to recognize that more and more and more and the more you recognize that the more amazing your life gets how do you create an amazing life by recognizing that life is already amazing under all conditions unconditionally amazing and when you recognize your own amazement the amazement of the whole universe you fall in love with it literally you are falling in love with yourself for eternity that's what God is that's what life is that's what we're doing here that's the only thing that can ever be done in reality nothing can ever be done that's not that all the technology we create all the wars we fight all the societies we build all the people we help all the cherries we contribute to all the children we save all the diseases we cure all the animals we save everything that we ever do and will ever do as species will be us falling deeper in love with our own selves because there's nothing else to do but recognize our own amazement more and more and more see every new scientific discovery that's made every new photograph that's taken and put on the on the Internet's and that you marvel at you know they they take a photo of a black hole or they take a photo of some nebula it looks pretty well they took some photo of a planet you know we fly by Pluto or Neptune or something snap a photo from a satellite we we go to Mars you know the first man on Mars in 50 years or whatever you know maybe it's L on Musk he's standing on Mars with this photograph you know he takes that photograph that he's gonna post it on on Twitter or something and and what are people gonna do they're gonna oh wow it's amazing or like Ellen Musk reveals the stupid cyber Trek god I think it's ugly he reveals that thinking it's like oh wow amazing everyone's like amazing even the people that hated are still like oh it's amazing but what is that that's just a new aspect of yourself being revealed to you see he doesn't matter if it's a truck or if it's a a kitten or if it's a planet or whatever it is new stuff is being revealed all the time new technology new creatures are evolving new ideas are occurring in your mind all of it is amazing always even the stuff you hate it's still amazing you just hate it cause you're selfish cuz you're biased but from God's point of view nothing is hated it's all amazing it's all equally amazing it's all equally great this is infinite love consciousness in love with what it is forever exploring itself tada that's what we're doing here let me just underscore that self-love does not mean that you become a doormat you can still take action you can still have boundaries it doesn't mean anything goes in fact if you're a doormat that's because you lack self-love if you're if you struggled with people pleasing your whole life it's because you have low self-esteem and you lack self-love otherwise you'd have boundaries self-love is also not a feminine quality make sure you don't make that mistake think that all leo but you're gonna turn me into some sort of girl some sort of woman or some sort of soy boy you know I'm a macho man I'm sort of a Joe Rogan type I don't want this self-love I want something you know something like I want some meat and some barbeque and some testosterone and some sports muscle cars this is the kind of stuff that I'm interested in not your girly self-love it's not girly self-love self-love is truth self-love is the ultimate truth it's more true than physics it's more true than mathematics I want you to open your mind to that possibility mathematics and physics is something humans invented self-love is prior to the existence of the universe it's not a human thing it integrates everything it's both feminine and masculine it's both strong and weak it's both rich and poor and everything else that you can think of this is not gonna make you girly if anything this will make you the strongest man you can be if what you really care about is being a true man although really you're not gonna be man at this point gonna be God you want to be God you want real God mode self-love [ __ ] that's God mode acting macho and tough that's not God mode that's that's man mode in fact that's juvenile man mode that's boy mode man boy mode is what that is god mode is self-love God mode is integration of everything including found in masculine together and transcending all that you don't even know what an orgasm is until you've realized they've got and that you are self-love self-love is like an infinite orgasm that never ends also don't make the mistake of thinking that self-love is egotism or narcissism this is not truly self-love this is small s self and lowercase L love which is in fact the obstacle to the self love that I've been talking about up to this point so like I said to expand or to practice self-love how do you actually practice it you must expand your sense of self and you must expand your sense of love and so here's a practical way to do it you're gonna take a wristband like this put it on your wrist and for the next week you're gonna walk around every time you notice this wristband on your wrist you are going to remember that throughout the next week you are looking for stuff that you hate or that you judge and anytime you notice something that you're hating or you're judging you're judging a car you're judging a picture you're judging a celebrity you're judging some politician you're hating in whatever you're gonna flip that around and you're gonna accept and embrace that thing that you're judging and hating you're gonna accept that first of all as yourself you're gonna expand your sense of stuff to include that thing so if you're watching the news and you see Donald Trump up there lying and bullshitting whatever he's doing you're gonna expand yourself to include him as you so he's you can you accept that if you see some Tesla cyber truck and you think it looks ugly great now notice this and realize oh that's me that's part of the universe so let me accept that as myself too and then as you expand yourself also love yourself so first you expand your set of self to include that object that you've been disconnected from your shadow integrate that shadow object and then I'm not telling you to love that object directly instead I'm telling you to love yourself right so if ordinarily let's say I look at this I look at the Tesla cyber truck I think it looks ugly okay that's sort of coming from my ego then I pause for a moment I see this and I realize oh okay that truck is actually me I expand my system self to include the truck I look at that truck and I say ah okay that's I'm looking at myself now I'm looking at basically I'm I'm looking at that truck as though I'm looking in the mirror as though I'm looking at my own face and then I feel myself with love for myself but my self is no longer just the leo unit and body here it includes the truck and maybe more stuff as well includes all that probably the whole universe so feel love now for the whole shebang as a whole feel love for that and recognize just remind yourself you don't even need to have mystical experience to do this this is just their ordinary exercise you can practices just then remind yourself using your inner talk from your mind remind yourself that this is what I am and this is what I love is being myself exactly how I am I don't need to change myself if that car it looks ugly whatever I love it anyways like that if your child does something you don't like okay fine but then expand your sense of self to include child and say okay but I love the whole situation and a good question you can ask yourself to do this is ask yourself what is something I find ugly about life does something come up for you right now do it do it right now with me think of something that you find ugly about life I don't just mean physical appearance ugly is a is a broad term I'm using it more figuratively in metaphorically here than literally for example maybe you find racism ugly maybe you find religion ugly I don't know whatever so bring that up to mind and then remind yourself now that that is you that thing that you think is ugly is you now embrace that ugliness because it's true you see this is this is the connection between love and truth I'm trying to point you to it can you see this it's a little subtle if you love the truth you love reality exactly as it is and not some other way exactly as it is see to be able to accept reality exactly as it is you have to love what is you see otherwise you can't accept it therefore truth and love are are literally identical to have the truth of something is to love it at the same time the love is what allows it to be true and vice versa see reality and consciousness is such a remarkable thing it's so infinite it includes so much infinite diversity it includes cockroaches and snakes and aliens and humans and planets and stars and it includes rapists it includes murderers and terrorists and includes Hitler it includes Stalin it includes everybody you don't like and and a million more things it includes all of that that's what consciousness is its infinite it has no limit its endless creativity that's you can you accept that can you accept yourself this is your true face when you take the totality of everything that that is the good and the bad and you look at all that and you look at it and you say now I'm really looking in the mirror before when I looked at my face in the mirror that wasn't my real face my real face is this entire singularity of every [ __ ] thing this is what I am this is God looking at God and then saying it to itself yeah this is what I am and I love it I don't need it to be different and can't be different it's a tautology it's infinity it can't be different because it is everything it is all possible difference that is the pinnacle of self-love when consciousness understands and accepts all of itself that is the full reunion to which you'll ultimately want to get to and then only by reaching that reunion that ultimate reunion of all of all divisions of all differences then from that you can you can come back into the world of difference and division and everything is recontextualized because you realize that you're just exploring your own interspecies as God in various limited ways as a human as a cockroach as a bird as an alien whatever it is as a trashcan consider the possibility that it's possible for you to exist as a trashcan and to be conscious as a trashcan being a trash can sound weird and impossible yeah anyways the deeper you go in this work the more you will see that it's all about self-love right now you are hearing this maybe for the first time you haven't had these mystical experiences you haven't had this grand you reunification you haven't recognized yourself as God so right now you can't appreciate what self-love really is you need a reference experience which is empty for you right now it's too abstract and that's fine five years from now ten years from now you'll come back and you'll you'll understand and you'll see how this played an important role in planting a seed in your mind that ultimately sprouted into this grand reunification now you might say but Leo so you say that self-love is the only teaching but don't you teach a lot of other stuff that isn't about self-love like you talk about epistemology you talk about quantum mechanics sometimes you talk about Google's incompleteness theorem you talk about cults and you talk about psychedelics or you talk about politics or you talk about life purpose or you talking about spiral dynamics you know Leo would what does what does quantum mechanics or Spile dynamics have to do with love all of these things I talk about are gonna converge and lead you towards the realization and embodiment of self-love so even the stuff that doesn't seem like it it has to do with self love of course from a strictly technical standpoint you know if you if you're studying quantum mechanics it doesn't talk about love so I'm not saying that you know quantum physicists understand love or that are they're proving love no not at all you'd have to go way beyond all that but it's gonna be a stepping stone for you eventually you'll understand how all of it came together led together and all these areas techniques and concepts that I've shared with you they were all in some way playing a small part a little stepping stone that helped you to climb the ladder up to the top of Mount Everest and look down below and see all of creation underneath you as you you looking at yourself see and all these different tools and models and theories and concepts and and techniques and things that I've shared with you these were just just helpful little tools to get you there if they were some of them might not be helpful some of them might be a distraction so you have to figure that out for yourself well you know what works for you I want to leave you with this self love is your touchstone in life it's your compass it's the thing you return to when you're lost when something is going wrong in your life terribly wrong and you don't know what to do you're confused you're befuddled bewildered overwhelmed remember to ask yourself how is self-love lacking in the situation but remember to keep a very robust notion of self and love in the back of your mind write very robust notion very broad notion sort of an existential notion of it not an egotistical notion so it's not always that you need to act more from your ego in fact usually not but just ask that question how is self-love lacking here notice that self-love is not taught in school or in university at all it's not taught at work or business at all it's not taught in marketing and sales at all it's not really even taught very much within dating advice or relationship advice it's hardly even taught in churches isn't that amazing isn't amazing that of all the different teachings that there are all the different institutions we have you know we have churches and schools and universities we have Harvard at MIT and we have we have think tanks and we have magazines and journals and we have all this but none of them teach self-love isn't that amazing and then we wonder why is the world so screwed up why is their societies so screwed up this is why now of course I'm not saying I'm the only one who teaches this I mean many Yogi's and sages and mystics and religious leaders have taught and demonstrated self-love to you from the beginning of time for over 10,000 years the Hindus have done it the Christians have done it the Jews and then every this is what religion is in its purest truest uncorrupted form the problem is that he gets so corrupt so quickly and so few people really ever understand it personally rather they take it on as beliefs and dogmas so forth that it gets drowned out and in fact those very mechanisms that are supposed to be teaching about self-love they teach you the opposite you can even go to a guru you can even go to an enlightened master you can go to an enlightened Zen master and he will tell you that love doesn't exist that love is an illusion you can go to some neo at Viton teacher and he will tell you that all love is just an illusion and once you awaken you will realize love is nonsense right because they haven't awoken to love yet so they'll tell you that with a straight face and they'll mislead you not because they're evil people just because they don't know what they don't know and there's many flavours degrees and versions of awakening they're not all the same and it took me quite a few awakenings too so to really lock down this this notion of self-love here's a homework assignment I'll leave you with besides the you know you're gonna do this wristband thing I hope and then also I would like you to make a list of all the ways in which you don't love yourself it could be your physical appearance it could be your personality it could be moral failings it could be stuff you've done in the past it could be the way you treat other people could be your health condition that you have whatever all the ways you don't love yourself make a long list get them all out of your system on this beast paper and then at the end of that decide to love all of that embrace all of that as what reality is this is what you are you're a lot more than just that but you are that too so embrace that and as you're trying that you're gonna struggle notice that there's a struggle notice it's hard notice that the ego and you resists accepting all that because you you want to be some sort of ideal self you want to be the way you imagine yourself on the silver screen in a Hollywood movie that's what isn't that's untruth you see why truth and love have to go hand in hand because for something to be true it has to be exactly the way that it is and not some other way that you want it to be or imagine it to be so maybe you imagine that I shouldn't say the word [ __ ] or maybe you imagine I shouldn't talk about rape or maybe you imagined that Liam should have more hair or maybe you imagine that leader should have a smaller nose or maybe you imagined utley you should look younger or older or do his beard different or whatever you imagine all of that is not true what's true is exactly what's here right now this is what I am like it or not and there's only two options we can either accept it or we can reject it if we reject it we cut ourselves off from ourselves do you see the insanity of rejecting it to reject any part of reality is literally insanity you are saying that what is true is untrue and you are saying what is untrue is true and that is the very definition of what I call devilry that's how the devil is born by rejecting the truth for a fantasy and the reason that happens is because the devil can't stomach the truth exactly as it is he needs it to be something else and from that all evil manifests from untruth evil is untruth evil is self-denial lack of self-love which is why the only ultimate solution to evil is a reunion a reintegration of all of your shadows and total self-love that's you coming home that's what you've always been that was the truth it's just that the truth is so big it got disconnected from itself confuse itself with falsehood but eventually it came home the truth cannot not love itself it must love itself otherwise it's not true this false and that is how love and truth are actually identical at a metaphysical essential level and that is why there is no full awakening without the realization of love if you think you're awake or enlightened and you haven't realized love you haven't fully realized truth you've only got one side of the coin you think you have truth but you're missing the love and conversely if you are an emotional person and you find it easy to love people to love animals to love children and yours a sort of lovey dovey type yet your whole life you know you've been loving maybe you're this probably is more appropriate to women or to more feminine leaning men you know women tend to be more lovey dovey and that tends to be their approach to spirituality it's likely oh I don't like talking about truth you know truth is so bleak and harsh and brutal love love is what I want I want more love in my life I want the spiritual path towards Awakening through love I don't really care about the truth Leah why should I care about the truth it's just a some philosophical my new show or it's some sort of technical thing this truth that you keep talking about I don't care about I just want love but what you're failing to realize is that love is truth your love isn't complete until you realize that the thing you love the most is the truth otherwise what are you loving if you're not loving the truth you're loving falsehood which makes you a devil and your love is your love is divided it's not total truth in love or one don't forget it learning self love is the point of human life if you love yourself completely you would have no more problems left in your life let me repeat that again if you love yourself completely you would have no more problems in your life this is true really think about that contemplate that one is it true and if it is what does that mean what should you do about it alright that's it I've done here please click like button for me and come check out actualize that org that's my website you'll find the life purpose course the book list my blog where I'm posting new stuff you can also click the link down below in the description for the patreon link if you'd like to support this work help me to spread it in the future I'm building a little bit of a nest egg that will help me with an advertising budget and so forth try to expand actualize that already in the years to come I think that will be a little handy and we can spread the word get more people to realize the power of some of these teachings because they're pretty rare and otherwise it's difficult for people to find them and I just want to leave you with one last sort of tip or warning I guess be careful with watching only a few of my videos I have a lot of content at this point over 300 videos you don't need to watch them all of course not but there's a trap here the trap is that you come in and you watch a couple of my recent videos and the stuff that I talk about now is so advanced that it's very easy to get lost and to misunderstand various words or phrases that I use because you have to understand that we've been kind of on a journey here with actual network for seven years some people have been growing with me throughout this whole process if you just watch one or two episodes you're gonna easily easily take things out of context easily misunderstand things make wrong assumptions about me make wrong assumptions about these teachings certain things you know I'm this this work really is a deep body of work that builds upon itself we're building very we built a very deep foundation over the years you do have to go back and watch some of those very deep foundational episodes about epistemology about metaphysics about quantum mechanics and other things you know groundwork has been laid and I can't rehash all of it every single time in every new episode so especially if you're new to this and you've only watched a few of the recent episodes you're gonna have to if you want to get the full value of this work to really understand it you're gonna have to go backwards and really dig through my work yeah it takes time it takes time that's one of the biggest challenges of this work is that it's so voluminous it's enormous it's huge organizing it all is a nightmare it's really difficult to organize this stuff and to break things down into separate little episodes and to put them in order of which you should watch them it was really difficult to do that that's one of my biggest struggles with this Iraq my mind over it every every week about what's the best way to organize this material and it's very difficult to organize it because it's just so sprawling that you could spend a year organizing it and then by the end of that year you think okay I'm done but then you realize that oh well that's just a little piece and now I have to reorganize even that piece because there's more pieces that come into play and so every time there's new pieces coming into play and everything needs to be reorganized and you know people are coming in in this at different times at different points so they have to kind of line go through this giant web and crawl the whole thing to really get a sense of what its shape is it's enormous it's almost like we're trying to look at an elephant through a microscope you know every episode is a little a little peek at an elephant through a microscope and to get a sense of the whole elephant you've got to probably watch at least 30 50 videos maybe a hundred of my videos to start to see the full elephant well even that's not gonna enough I mean it's just gonna be an outline just a guess for you usually gonna have to do with a lot of the practices it's not just gonna be videos you have to read books I mean I'm asking a lot of you guys and that's because the whole channel from the very beginning has been about depth depth that's one of my top values in life is depth the videos are deep they're long because I wanted to be deep I don't want to do videos that aren't deep I want to go deep I want to go balls deep in this [ __ ] that's what I'm interested in you know if if I'm having sex I don't want to just like stick the tip in and then like be okay cool good ten little 10 10 minute video about God or ten minute video about love that's like sticking the tip in once and then coming that's what that is that's the equivalent of that in the bedroom like you want a good deep [ __ ] that's what you want and you want it to last for a good hour that's what you really want right I mean if you if you love life if you love sex that's what you want you want that depth but of course that depth takes commitment from you takes work is it worth it huh I think it is give it a shot study it for 10 years and then and then let me know you